Today I thought I would give some advice due to some personal events happening in my life at the moment. Oftentimes, through no fault of the parents, at least one of your children will try to assert his/her authority. Given the size of our family (10 children) it was no surprise that we fell to this often troubling event in proper child rearing. I've decided to write down for the benefit of all who read my ramblings. I will ask you to be careful as some of the things I have written could find me in disfavor with the Parson. In addition, some of the things are written as delicately as possible but still may seem offending considering the nature of the situation.
10. Sometimes stays in bed until after 5 am.
9. In his sock drawer, you find pictures of women without bonnets.
8. Shows up at barn raisings in full "Kiss" makeup.
7. When you criticize him, he yells, "Thou sucketh!"
6. His name is Jebediah, but he goes by "Jeb Daddy."
5. Defiantly says, "If I had a radio, I'd listen to rap."
4. You come upon his secret stash of colored socks.
3. Uses slang expression: "Talk to the hand, 'cause the beard ain't
listening."
2. Was recently pulled over for "driving under the influence of
cottage cheese."
1. He's wearing his big black hat backwards.
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